Most people date the wrong way. They chase the spark, mistake attraction for compatibility, and expect their partners to read their minds. Then, they wonder why relationships don’t last.
Logan Ury thinks about dating differently. As a behavioral scientist and the Director of Relationship Science at Hinge, she’s spent years studying what makes relationships work. Her findings will change your thinking about attraction, communication, and commitment.
In this conversation, Logan reveals why the spark is overrated, how to optimize your dating profile, and the one thing (actually, 8) you must do after every first date. We break down attachment theory, orbiting, polyamory, and having hard conversations.
Available now: YouTube | Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Transcript
Logan Ury is a behavioral scientist, dating coach, and the Director of Relationship Science at Hinge. She’s the bestselling author of How Not to Die Alone.
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome Logan!
01:53 The Spark
05:25 Dating in the Modern Environment
06:15 The Post-Date 8
12:51 Dating Like a Scientist
15:02 The height thing…
17:05 The Difference Between Spark and Lust
24:43 The Fear of Rejection
27:05 Attachment Theory
46:36 Understanding Attachment Styles in Relationships
50:11 Texting Etiquette
01:03:43 Post-First Date Communication
01:06:55 Polyamory
01:11:50 Orbiting
01:16:45 Assumptions and Misunderstandings in Dating
01:35:31 Decision Points in Relationships
01:39:56 Having Difficult Conversations in Relationships
01:49:18 Other Significant Others
01:57:15 Breaking Up Respectfully
02:00:16 Creating Effective Dating Profiles
